This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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