my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize