Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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