Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
