His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
