Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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