i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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