How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
