Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
