You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
