you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
