you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
