i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
