Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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