How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
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