sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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