i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
