PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
it was like eating out sand paper
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
