I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
