Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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