"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
