while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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