Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
This is my gift to your gina
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize