We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I understand Curling. That high.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
