The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize