I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
