I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
