fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
