I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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