in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
