Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Randomize
