This girl is more easily done than said...
My cat gives me a boner
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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