Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
