Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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