i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Randomize
