i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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