dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
they call him Oral-B. enough said
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
