i think my tv is drunk
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
