At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize
