at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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