It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
smell my finger.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize