and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
