And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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