dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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