We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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