Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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