All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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