So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I love you.
Bad choice
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