When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
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Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
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I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
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