Actions speak louder than pants.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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