So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
he shaved USA in his pubs
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
this must be what syphilis tastes like
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Randomize
