Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
