My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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